[disclaimer: this post has no real content and is essentially just me venting. carry on if you wish]
sometimes i just feel like – i’m so frustrat – my thoughts make no sen – maybe i’m angr – i’m just really – no i think that – i’m confus – maybe if i – i think if – i dont know –
sound familiar? if so, then i am so sorry. because you are terrible at expressing your thoughts, too.
do you ever just have so many thoughts running through your mind that you simply cannot form them into individual and coherent phrases an they are all just a jumbled mess inside your head and it is so frustrating you just want to scream and punch a hole in the wall? lucky you, you’re not alone.
this past week has been so emotionally and mentally trying and i have no idea how to process it all. i consider that to be one of my weak points – i suck at processing large quantities of emotions all at one time. my go to coping mechanism is usually to ignore everything or to sleep as much as possible to avoid having to actually deal with anything. but we all know that only leaves me with more shit to think about once i wake back up – it’s a cycle that is really hard to break.
i guess this post is my way of trying to sort everything out without explaining every single thing i’m feeling in great detail. but i’ll try my best:
i’m disappointed in myself and in some of my friends. i’m frustrated with school and myself and life and all of the above. i’m confused by all of the thoughts going through my head right now. i’m lost because i thought i knew what i wanted but now i’m starting to question everything? i’m angry but i don’t really know why? my guess is because of the combination of all of the other things i can’t figure out. i’m tired and just want to sleep for a very long time but life is going on and on and i cannot just sleep and let it go by without me.
i feel like i’m rambling right now and i promise i’m not trying to sound deep and philosophical this is just how my mind is racing right now.
confused and exhausted? me too. welcome to the fun.